Modern Major Canderous
by DWH
Summary: All right, I confess to being a bit of a Gilbert and Sullivan nerd... so of course it was obligatory for me to parody the ever popular Modern Major General. So now, for your singing enjoyment, Canderous Ordo... Gilbert and Sullivan style.


1**I am the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore**

**Canderous:**

I am the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

I've information present and of all things that have gone before

I know the Knights of Coruscant, and quote the fights historical

From Onderon to Malachor, in order categorical

I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters strategetical

I understand all tactics, both the real and hypothetical

About binomial entry codes I'm teeming with a lot o' facts

With many cheerful facts about the people we mean to attack

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

With many cheerful facts about the people we mean to attack

With many cheerful facts about the people we mean to attack

With many cheerful facts about the people we mean to-a to attack

**Canderous:**

I'm very good with making sure our people are not penitent

I know the way to infiltrate all beings who are sentient

In short, in matters present and of all things that have gone before

I am the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

In short in matters present, and of all things that have gone before

He is the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Canderous:**

I know our mythic history, of Revan and the great Sith War

I blast all en'my fighters, I've a taste for missiles that go far

I quote in elegiacs all the tales of flying Basilisks

And tell in gory detail all the times that I have taken risks

I can tell undoubted Jedi traps from many miles away in space

I know the number of grenades it takes to level Davik's place

Then I can the difference 'tween two soldiers who look just the same

And tell all of the tales from that Knights of the Old Republic game

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

And tell all of the tales from that Knights of the Old Republic game

And tell all of the tales from that Knights of the Old Republic game

And tell all of the tales from that Knights of the Old Republicpublic game

**Canderous:**

Then I can write a washing bill in some ancient Sith cuneiform

And tell you ev'ry detail of Darth Revan's former uniform

In short, in matters present and of all things that have gone before

I am the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

In short, in matters present and of all things that have gone before

He is the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Canderous:**

In fact, when I know what is meant by "rapid shot" and "force persuade"

When I can tell at sight a blaster rifle from a vibroblade

When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at

And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat"

When I can hit a kill-shot from a dead run to a comfy walk

When I know more of tactics than a gizka on the Ebon Hawk

In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy

You'll say that Mandalore is just the greatest of this century

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

You'll say that Mandalore is just the greatest of this century

You'll say that Mandalore is just the greatest of this century

You'll say that Mandalore is just the greatest of this centurcentury

**Canderous:**

For my military knowledge, of which I've acquired quite a sum

Has only been brought down e'er since the start of the millennium

But still, in matters present and in all things that have gone before

I am the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

But still, in matters present and in all things that have gone before

He is the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore

**Encore:**

**Canderous:**

Although it seems at times we've been reduced to simple thuggery

To mercenary fighting and to general skulduggery

We'll train anew and and so display the honour that comes after us

And maybe this time have a fate that's not quite so disasterous

We'll add our tales to those of honour from the Jedi Civil War

And give you a perspective new of things that happened still before

And so I'll tell you now, in case the game went by too fast for ya...

You'll find out that the whole time I was really dating Bastila!

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

You'll find out that the whole time he was really dating Bastila

You'll find out that the whole time he was really dating Bastila

You'll find out that the whole time he was really dating Bastibastila

**Canderous:**

Though I may not be the charmer that some other men will try to be

I managed yet to find a girl whose warrior sense appealed to me

And even though I'm not the guy the Council had her looking for...

I'm STILL the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore!

**Chorus of Mandalorians:**

And even though he's not the guy the Council had her looking for

He's still the model of the leader of the clans of Mandalore!


End file.
